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I was trying to start writing this ad while I was at work today. One of my co-workers asked what I was writing about, and I realized I didn't really have an answer. So, I asked a group of my co-workers, if they were trying to describe me to someone who had never met me, what would they say.
The following are excerpts from their responses.
He's 9 feet tall and puts leaded gas in his morning coffee.
He sleeps in a suit and tie, but won't tie his shoes for a funeral.
He knows a lot about sandwiches.
He eats children and took a bear to the prom.
He fell asleep on top of a police horse once.
None of those things are technically true, except the bit about the sandwiches, which in all honesty, came from the least funny of my co-workers, but I've always wondered what kind of impression I make on people if I'm not trying to make an impression one way or the other.
It was a sobering experience, but I can't say I was displeased by the picture they painted.
It makes me want to meet the kind of girl who drinks whiskey out of a coffee can and throws other people's shoes at limousines. I don't even know if that's a kind of girl who exists, but I'd like the chance to introduce myself if she does.
I'm Dan. I'm probably free this Friday.
- Location: Suburban Minneapolis
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
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